First Night Out Nerves? Read this.
If your first night out after Freedom Day went by in a blur, worry not – you’re not the only one. After so long having to deal with tier restrictions, the rule-of-six, and awkward questions about whether the government would sanction you nicking cheeky ciggies off complete strangers in your locals’ smoking area, the last few weeks have left many of us wondering what is going on, where are all my friends, and where the hell have I left my phone?!
Since clubs reopened on the 19th July, all bets have been off (although the government is also advising us to remain cautious). After so long navigating our way through a cornucopia of social distancing guidelines and moral qualms about whether it’s socially acceptable to get off with that guy you met on Bumble, freedom has got us feeling a little bit uneasy about where we stand. With the government urging us to go out and spend our money, whilst simultaneously telling us to take personal responsibility for our own and our friends’ safety, it’s completely reasonable to be thinking ‘WTF? How is this allowed?’ on your first night out post-COVID.
Harriet, 26, has definitely been feeling the strain after so long locked in her flat scrolling through Tik Tok. “I went to a ‘Freedom Day’ house party the Saturday after restrictions lifted. Leading up to it, I was so excited about meeting new people, making new connections, and having new conversations. However, when I walked in, I started to panic and felt really uncomfortable around people, like I had no idea how to talk to strangers anymore.” Harriet isn’t alone – there’s been a massive increase in people reporting feelings of social anxiety in the wake of the pandemic. Psychologists warned us that, after fifteen months of social distancing guidelines, there was going to be a secondary mental health pandemic, with young people right at the heart of it.
Harriet’s social anxiety was only compounded by the accompanying health anxiety she felt. “In order to make up for how awkward I was being, I got blackout drunk, had an argument with my flatmates about which McDonalds we should go to, and didn’t remember walking in the front door,” she says. “My absolute shame about this was only heightened by all kinds of worries. I was worried for the people I live with and my family, in case I gave them COVID, and then I was worried because I had about no idea how careful I was being about hand washing and stuff like that.”
Harriet says the fact her COVID awareness may have slipped whilst she was drunk was one of her biggest hangover regrets. “I was so considerate throughout all of this – the idea of messing it all up for one disastrous night out really added to my sense of shame the next day,” she told us. For months now, wearing a mask and using hand sanitiser has not only been advised by the government, but it has become a source of pride, and even a political statement, for some others. Letting all that go was always going to be tricky, and a heightened awareness of germs may stick with us, even after COVID has been forgotten.
However, not all of us feel the same way Harriet does. Some of us are simply happy to be getting out there again. Izzy, 24, told us that she “can’t remember a lot” about her first night out on Freedom Day. “I definitely feel like I need more practice (hahaha). I adjusted to the lack of restrictions fairly quickly. It was strange to be around that many people again, but I was in my element. It was so fun to get back out there again and just be young again without having to think about masks, sanitiser, and how close I’m standing to the people around me.
Izzy told us that, unlike Harriet, she “hadn’t been experiencing a lot of COVID anxiety. I am more chill than all my other friends. However, even I had a new perspective on clubs when I went out again with my besties. It showed me how gross they really are and how many colds I must’ve gotten from dancefloors and club toilets in the past.”
Izzy said that she had been expecting pubs and bars to be taking a lot more precautions against the virus than they actually did. For months, business owners in the news have told us about all the ways in which they’re striving to make their venues safe for customers and staff. “We went for pre’s at this riverside pub, then onto a cocktail bar, and finally on to a club. Upon arrival at the pub, we expected that table services, masks, and table bookings would still be commonplace – however, it was the complete opposite. Everyone was going up to the bar instead of waiting for the waitress, people were talking to strangers again, and pretty much nobody was wearing masks anymore. Everywhere felt the same as it was before coronavirus was even a thing.”
All of this was overshadowed by a complete sense of relief for Izzy. “The biggest feeling that I have is a sense of relief that normal life can resume. I want us all to get back to our old lives. Although I’m not a massive clubber, I am so happy that it is now an option again, and it’s so great to see everybody on my timeline getting out there, getting pissed, and having a wonderful time again with their mates.” When I asked her if she’d had any memorable moments on her ‘Freedom Day’ night out, Izzy said she’d been so drunk she “swore she saw Ed Sheeran in a cocktail bar in Putney. I was so drunk I went up to him and wouldn’t leave him alone till he gave me a high five.”
If harassing Ed Sheeran lookalikes in a cocktail bar doesn’t sum up the national mood as we head into August, then I don’t know what does. However you're feeling about the return to normality, just know that there are plenty of others who feel exactly the same as you. We're all trying our best to get on with things, and we all have different ways of going about it - some of us argue about Maccies, others harass Ed Sheeran lookalikes in Be At One. As summer turns into autumn, hopefully we’ll all be able to chill out a bit more and learn how to live with COVID without letting it take over every aspect of our lives.
Words by Rebecca Clayton