by Cole Campbell
Fucking shit, bouncers are a bunch of knob ends who think they're guarding Buckingham fucking palace, once fat boy checked my ID and eventually let me in after a 5 minute debate on whether i actually am Cole Campbell or not, i obviously (being an alcoholic) go straight to the bar to buy a drink. Ofcourse the barmen doesn't have any goldschläger so instead i ask for a tequilla rose, which they also don't have.. At this point i am ofcourse still very parched and for my third option ask for a god dam Jâgerbomb, i give the bloke a tenner and the thick cunt gives me £3.50 changee. As pissed off as i was, i thought i'd try and have a good time and therefore head on over to the dance floor to cut some serious shapes, but it's hard to do that when DJ dickhead is playing Justin Bieber.... Fuck this i'm going home.

Club International

St. Georges Arcade
Falmouth, Cornwall
TR11 3DH
Phone: 01326 311 284